Bob Schultek
Author of
The Gauntlet

You may be trying to start a relationship, or a debate. It’s important that your message be received. To succeed, a connection must first be created, and that involves much more than your spoken words.

Just 7% of what is stated is heard and believed; how your message is communicated, and what others see while you’re delivering it, conveys over 90% of your message, 38% and 55% respectively. Consider this the next time you want to use a social media tool to connect with someone on an important issue.

Connecting occurs on 4 levels:

  1. What people see (visual connection): All communication creates an impression of the communicator that either strengthens or weakens the message. For a connection to be received openly, causing a positive dialogue to begin, be aware of how you look to others – dress and act appropriately for the audience, the situation and the message.
  2. What people understand (intellectual connection): A productive intellectual connection requires that your knowledge of a subject be credible and that it reflects your conviction. Sharing a personal experience often opens people’s hearts and minds.
  3. What people feel (emotional connection): People feel your attitude, positive or negative, when you’re communicating. While you speak, they observe your energy, intensity and sincerity. This either attracts or alienates them, impacting your connection attempt. Your attitude always overpowers your words.
  4. What people hear (verbal connection): Everything you do with your voice while communicating affects your potential to connect. Your tone, inflection, timing, volume and pacing impact the response you will receive. When the need to connect is vital, plan both your message and how you will deliver it.
Words are powerful, the “currency of ideas,” but they are just a small part of making an essential connection.
How often do you consider how you appear
and speak when seeking to connect?
In what ways could you improve your communication skill?